Wife Life Wednesday: Bacon

Wife Life Wednesday_

For the past two months, God’s love has looked a lot like bacon.

Yes, bacon.

That most delicious and smelly-good piece of heaven on earth.

I digress.

Marriage is not always easy. And we (I) do not always make it easy for others to love us unconditionally. Mark, my husband, has had to walk with me through a few years of chronic illness already – though, thankfully, I no longer have to worry about chronic fatigue.

This has been a different kind of year for us – because we’ve never really been a couple in the same country when I’ve been truly well. It’s been a year of adventure for me – trips to Malaysia, Texas, and Fiji PLUS working with our youth group here in New Zealand. It’s been good, and God is in all of the refreshing.

But on the last trip I took – a youth group trip to Fiji – I found myself sick with an unidentified virus. And there was no way to communicate with Mark. Or anyone for that matter.

I hope to tell you more about that trip later on.

Mark met me at the airport when I came home, and I was put in a wheelchair to be taken out to the car. I cried and cried and cried, and for about a month I was not myself. I was just a girl recovering from a virus, healing inside and outside from my week away from Mark.

It's time forI am here to say, on “Wife Life Wednesday”, that God’s love can be found in the little things. God’s love can be found anywhere – from Fiji to Texas to New Zealand and back again. God’s love can be found in marriage – whether in the good times or the bad. I am lucky that in the good times, I can see God’s love in my husband. I know that it not always the case.

Mark brought me breakfast in bed every single morning for almost two straight weeks. He brought or prepared all my meals for me that entire month.

He loved me unconditionally, daily showing me the love of God through his actions.

And every morning for breakfast, he made me bacon.

Yes, bacon.

I hope that today, you are able to count your blessings. To see or remember something good in your life – whether you are married or not.

And maybe… maybe you can cook up some bacon tomorrow morning for breakfast.

 

Reality of Fairy Tales

What does a fairy tale really look like?

I’m sitting here in a sun-drenched bach, looking out the window at green mountains and valleys – out into the ocean and the beach down the hill, out to boats resting in the harbour for the winter. The water is so blue, I could easily mistake it for sky, so the boats look like little seagulls flying far away. The song of native birds rings out in the air – beautiful hymns that the tui sings with the angels and happy, joyful tunes from the fantails as they flit and float through the trees. The deep, intimate ballads of the wind and the sea makes it easy to feel that I am one with this place – that nature doesn’t mind sharing itself with me.

Untitled design (2)When Mark & I were married eight months ago, I felt a sort of happiness that I’d not felt before. It was similar to the calm I feel right now, sitting here. That everything was alright in the world – that I was one with another person. He and I are the same.

We have only been married for those mere eight months, but I have a different view of a fairy tale than I had before we got married. I mean, I knew that marriage was hard, and I was not soooo naïve that I thought we were going to live the rest of our lives in a magical castle and ride together on horseback every afternoon of our lives. I knew that I probably wouldn’t be wearing a crown or that fluffy pink dress every day for the rest of my life. Fairy tales have a use, but they look a bit different when they aren’t animated and people aren’t singing and dancing like a flash mob wherever you go.

Having said that, marriage is better than I imagined. You know how the prince and the princess ride away in their carriage after the wedding and you don’t really know what happens in “happily ever after”? In this “honeymoon stage” of my marriage, I feel like the movie should start with the wedding. Yeah, I’m lonely sometimes (even though I have Mark) and I get sad and homesick, but there is another person with me. I am his and he is mine. Where he goes, I go. Where he stays, I stay.

This goes for friendships, too. Mark is my best friend, but I have other best friends as well. I have a best friend in Holliday, a couple in Oklahoma, another in Dallas, and luckily, one in New Zealand. They bring me peace and comfort. And I think that a committed friendship is like marriage in a lot of ways. My best friends are my friends for life and we don’t give up on each other in the hard times. We get closer.

So, sitting here in the Coromandel, gazing out the windows into the sunshine, listening to the wind and waves soothe our souls, I reflect on peace and I reflect on my friendship and on my marriage. I am grateful for the friendships my husband has – that we can be here with his friends, and that he is out there now spearing fish with his friend’s spear gun, wearing another friend’s weight belt.

I am thankful that our friend found a octopus yesterday. I never dreamt of ever seeing one in real life.the octopus

I am thankful for the starfish and the kina we found.

I am thankful for the quartz and jasper at the top of the ocean.

I am thankful my husband let me bring home seashells and random rocks.

I am thankful that he found a perfect paua shell for me to keep.

I am thankful for the sunset’s colours pouring out over the Coromandel cliffs and valleys.

I am thankful for these little things.

Mark has finished his studies for nursing, and took his final test last week – the state exam. He has been offered a job where we wanted to be, and so many others won’t get jobs or interviews this time around. We have a roof over our heads, and a fireplace for the winter.

I am thankful for all these big things.

I get to experience a fairy tale – walking barefoot on the sand with my lover, my husband, my best friend – sharing my life with him, laughing when he laughs and crying when he is sad. I am thankful for this life in the good and the bad. And I want to remember to do that for the rest of my life. My happiness doesn’t depend on my husband or my friendships. But they do enhance my life.

This fairy tale – this life we have – is ongoing, and I’m glad it doesn’t end with a wedding.